Back in my early twenties I used pot to give me an appetite when I was “healing” from my eating disorder. I told myself I was smoking to help me heal, but the truth is I was smoking to numb my feelings and pain. The marijuana helped me to eat, but did not help me to heal.
My vicious cycle looked like this;
- Restrict food all day
- At night get high
- Eat a bunch of food (because my body needed the nourishment, and because the pot made me feel ravenous)
- Feel guilty about all the food I just ate (as my high wore off it became clear how much I had just consumed, because my ability to actually feel physical fullness came back)
- The next day restrict again
I didn’t have the support I needed to allow pot to help me heal from my eating disorder and simultaneously relearn how to eat intuitively. As I look back, I wonder if even with support I could have actually worked towards eating intuitively while also smoking pot. My guess is yes, with a good multidisciplinary team (dietitian, therapist, someone familiar with cannibas, etc.). I’m sure marijuana has been part of eating disorder treatments, I am not well versed in this type of therapy aside form my own personal history. So that begs the question; with the appropriate support, could you set out on a journey of intuitive eating while also smoking pot chronically or occasionally? Can you actually eat intuitively when you are high?
What Happens When You Smoke Marijuana?
If you’ve never smoked you may not understand this, but eating when you are high is a thrill akin to your first meal after running a marathon, or your first meal after dieting, or after a colonoscopy. The thing is, that thrill comes about every single time you smoke (at least it did for me). Even with training and coaching on how to listen to my fullness cues, I venture a guess that your skills would be out the door when you’re high. This article from PBS Newshour explains how when you smoke pot your brain is essentially tricked into thinking it’s still hungry… in fact ravenous! This is even if you have just finished a full meal.
Feeling Your Fullness
A big part of intuitive eating is learning to feel your fullness. Eating mindfully, slowing down, minimizing distractions, paying attention to your food, choosing foods that will fill you up; these are all ways to start feeling your fullness. When you are high, mindful eating isn’t really a thing. Even if it was, the signals of fullness are all but lost, and you will continue to eat even after your body has reached physical fullness.
Should You Use Marijuana?
Whether or not you use marijuana is completely up to you. There are many benefits of medical marijuana and you may find that it’s a great option for you, after a discussion with your doctor, and if you live in a state where it’s legal medicinally. As you are working on intuitive eating, I tend to think using marijuana regularly will make the process a little more difficult, but not impossible. The most important thing is to be aware of how it will affect you. Just knowing how the drug works in your brain, and overrides fullness signals, is a good start. From there you can find strategies to figure out your “high fullness”. For example, are there fullness signals you do get when you are high, that maybe you aren’t noticing? Start to pay closer attention to your body when you are high. You may also want to consider getting high after eating a meal, as food will not be quite as enticing when you are already full. Another option might be to consider CBD oil, a component of the cannibas plant that doesn’t actually get you high, but which also has many health benefits.
I would love to hear how you’ve used marijuana on your intuitive eating journey, and how you have worked through feeling your fullness!
